No, you didn’t accidentally eat the wrong brownie from the freezer. One of Canada’s largest banks even sent traders a Christmas poem about the management of the Governor of the Bank of Canada (BoC). It actually turns out to be a tradition at the National Bank of Canada (NBC), who should really be giving a masterclass on shadow casting. They’ve been publishing them for seven years, which I think means they can shred the oldest.

This year’s Christmas poem is a parody of Good King Wenceslas called Good Guv’nor Macklem. You certainly know the poem, even if you don’t know it by name. Here’s the scene from love actually where Hugh Grant does an impromptu lecture, for those who need a refresher.

The poem is not overly critical of Good Guv’nor Macklem, but does not portray him as a man of the public. It starts by ignoring the issues they need to prioritize, such as inflation and input costs. Then celebrates the gains that stocks have made from ‘printing’ and ignores the fact that the market sees the rates so low as irresponsible. Circumstances that are a tragedy for the working and middle class, but great for the rich.

Don’t be surprised if you hear a lot of new Porsches and yachts called Tiffany next year.

Full poem and accompanying artwork below.

Good Guv’nor Macklem

A poem inspired by the holiday classic Good King Wenceslas.

By Warren Lovely, Managing Director at National Bank of Canada and Chief Rates and Public Sector Strategist.

Good Guv’nor Macklem looked out
During the holiday period
With rising inflation
And job gains unequal
Most stocks shone bright that night
Although the input costs were cruel
When the Prime Minister came into view
Collect votes to rule

Here, merchant, stand with me,
If you know, telling
Over there, who is he?
Where and what are transactions?
Guv, he works across the street,
Beyond the Eternal Fountain
Under the clock that bay
Through the steps for mountin’

Bring me bonds and bring me stocks
Bring me credit here
We will see supporters flocking
As assets become more expensive
Board of Directors, there they went
Forward they went together
Lifting speeds to a lesser extent
Than the current gambler

Guv, the outlook is better now
Animal spirits stronger
Cheers my heart that you allow
Offer risk longer.
Watch my prediction good traders
Make your markets brave
You will find rate policy
Cools assets less cold.

Stepping into the Guv’nors we tread
Front-end rates are listed
Capital gains turned out to be very broad
Wherever they are printed
Therefore, investor, be sure:
Own a job or house
Yes, who walks a measured pace
Gives markets a blessing.